Journal 2

 

Femi Hollinger-Janzen

Professor Sloan

English W131

2 September, 2012

1)

(Quote) Nagel uses this point to emphasize to people that humans and bats are closely related in many aspects, such as the way our internal organs function.

(Straighten out the logical connections) The part where I say uses this point to emphasize to people that humans, I could get ride of the to people and just have, Nagel uses this point to emphasize that humans and bats…

2)

(Quote) But people cannon truly understand what it is like to e a bat unless they actually became a bat. Humans explore how bats use sonar to maneuver around and catch their rood, but cannon fully grasp the life of a bat. Nagel explains repeatedly that no matter how much we study bats, we will never fully know what they are like.

(Provide some variety) With these three sentences they all sound  about the same, I need to come up with some new ideas for these sentences to set them more apart from one another. 

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